Category: Humorous

What Dave wants (apparently…)

While reading through a friend of a friend‘s blog today I came across a funny and slightly disturbing little internet based game.

Type “[your name] needs” into google and see what comes back.

Apparently Dave needs:

  • DAVE NEEDS VACATION FROM CARRYING HIS FIANCEE’S BAGS
  • Dave needs Firefox and BugMeNot
  • Dave needs plywood
  • Dave needs to have that mole looked at
  • Dave needs a Shave(this at least is true)
  • Dave needs a big hand for what he has done
  • Dave needs to start paying more attention to what Judi does around here

And that was only on the first 2 pages of results…

So that’s what 1200 donuts looks like…

Penny arcade has a bloody funny little story going at the moment.

It all started when they posted a comic where they were giving Sony Online Entertainment (SOE) a hard time and comparing SOE’s games to some rather unorthadox pastry products.

In reply to this Sony sent the boys at Penny Arcade 1200 Krispy Kreme donuts. Gabe and Tycho simply didn’t have any comeback. The photos are on the site at the link above. It’s quite priceless.

Very English

I realised after the whole car-through-the-fence situation had sorted itself out, that possibly the most amusing aspect of the whole thing was my reaction to events. First I ascertained that everything was safe, then I called the emergency services, then I checked that the driver was OK, and then I went and got him a cup of tea. I mean how spectacularly English is that? “Guy’s just crashed into our house: Oh, I know, a nice cup of tea will make him feel better….”

Cumulus in my bathroom

I as having a particularly hot and enjoyable shower this morning, and it was a little cold outside, and when I got out of the shower there were clouds in my bathroom.

It was super cool.

They were moving around on the air currents in the room. They had distinct densities and gaps. They almost had shapes (although that may have just been my brain wanting them to have shapes….).

Anyway, it was almost a bit of a pity when they finally dissapated, leaving only codensation on the walls…

Will Wheaton = funny

I read this article the other day which was an interview with Will Wheaton (who if you are old enough and geeky enough to remember, played young Wesley Crusher in Star Trek: The Next Generation) about what he’s doing now, and it was really really funny.

They’ve got it all wrong

I’ve never thought about it before, but it occurs to me that someone got it all wrong when they were naming a couple of things.

Firstly we have to consider undies. This is of course a common and perfectly reasonable contraction of the term “underwear”, which also makes sense, given that is worn under your other clothes.

The problem arises however when you consider that (on women at least) the undies go over the overies (OK, I’m corrupting the spelling there to support my argument, but hopefully you understand where I’m coming from).

So which is it. Are the overies over, or are the undies over, and if the undies are over the overies how do we reconcile that so that it doesn’t break my brain when I try and think about it too hard…

Doing a Dover Samuels

I was just looking at the Red Vs. Blue website, and watched their “Thanksgiving Day PSA (Public Service Announcement)” video, at which point I almost wet myself and temporarily lost the ability to breathe due to the fact that I was laughing so uncontrollably.

The video is available in a number of formats: WMV (14Mb), Quicktime (19Mb) or DivX (19Mb). Go watch it!!!

As for the whole Dover Samuels reference, if you want to know what it’s about, read this, or look at this, otherwise try not to think about it too much.

Comedic piracy

While flicking channels the other day I wandered onto an episode of Parkinson where I heard this great joke, which I have decided to pirate for your edification:

A man walks into a pub in ireland, walks up to the bar, and says to the barman, “Can you tell me the quickest way to get to Dublin?”
The barman looks at him and asks “Are you walking or are you driving?”
“I’m driving”, replies the man.
To which the barman says, “Well that would be the fastest way”

(Right. I think I did a pretty crap job of writing it down (it sounds better out loud I think) but you get the idea…)

What’s your fetish?

A while ago Phil (who I seem to be mentioning an awful lot on this blog recently) told me about this brilliant quote/notion that stated “I am somebody’s fetish”, with the grounding rationale being that in a global population of six and a half billion people and the inherent variabilty in human sexuality, then no matter how alternative or main stream you are, there is going to be someone out there on the planet who sees you as an object of desire. I had found the idea quite funny, and apparently you can get T-shirts with the quote printed on the front.

As such when I rolled over in bed the other day and found my nose in Simone’s armpit, she joked that perhaps that was my fetish, and I took the opportunity to plug “Armpit fetish” into google. Simone didn’t think that there would be many hits. How wrong she was. 37,800 odd sites apparently. Somehow I wasn’t so surprised that there were lots of people with that fetish, but who would have thought that there were that many!!!